scatterplot: do as we say and no one gets hurt!

That’s right, scatter brains. We’ve got one of your precious little “ribbons.” And he’s frayed. Very a-frayed. But you have the power to end the suffering. Just comply with the following five demands and no one gets hurt.

  1. Immediately release Michael Sauder, Jenn Lena, and all other orgtheory guests who have been forced to write for you.
  2. Jeremy shall rename the computer text game “Violet.” The game’s new name shall be “Teppö.”
  3. Drek shall now be known as “Drek the Underwhelmed.”
  4. When Jeremy assumes his position on the ASA publications committee, he shall require all ASA journal articles to cite at least one sociology blog.
  5. By midnight tomorrow, drop off 1,000,000,000 scatterplot dollars in a small duffel bag by the Panda Express, next to the guy in the panda suit.

These demands are not negotioable. And if there’s any funny business, Dr. Khan, you’ll find a tangle of white and blue thread in your faculty mailbox.

The Orgtheory Liberation Army

Written by fabiorojas

April 1, 2009 at 1:15 am

13 Responses

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  1. Who told you about “Teppö”? I have been working on it for months! Why do you think I haven’t been blogging?


    Jeremy Freese

    April 1, 2009 at 3:02 am

  2. This “fabiorojas” does not speak for the People. The so-called “Orgtheory Liberation Army” is nothing but a crypto-Trotskyite faction whose members were long-ago expelled from the Orgtheory Liberation Front having been found to be conspiring against the Revolutionary Committee for the Infiltration of Otherwise Respectable MBA Programs (RCIORMBAP). Ingrates. Please be sure to drop off your duffel bag to the OLF member at Panda Express, and ignore the OLA splitter with the fanny pack and Han Solo t-shirt.



    April 1, 2009 at 3:27 am

  3. Bring it!



    April 1, 2009 at 12:43 pm

  4. I can see we’re gearing up for San Francisco.


    Jenn Lena

    April 1, 2009 at 12:48 pm

  5. I’m reminded of that challenge to a fist-fight from a couple of years back.

    Could I interest you in altering that one demand to, “…shall now be known as ‘Drek the Underwhelming'”? Seems to capture it a bit better.



    April 1, 2009 at 2:00 pm

  6. I’m not going to lose any appendages this time am I?



    April 1, 2009 at 3:40 pm

  7. Count me in for the thumb-wrestling and the whack-a-mole competitions.



    April 1, 2009 at 3:59 pm

  8. I’m not going to lose any appendages this time am I?

    Oh please Fabio, can you tell us the tale of the nine-fingered Brayden and the Ring of PowerPoint?



    April 1, 2009 at 4:31 pm

  9. Drek: We’re trying to encourage you to use the active voice.

    Kieran: I ain’t saying anything to OLF counter-revolutionaries.

    Tina & Shakha: It’s a thumb rumble.



    April 1, 2009 at 5:28 pm

  10. Fabio: Oh, don’t worry- I’m actively underwhelming. When you meet me, you’ll agree! It’s hardly worth the anticipation!



    April 1, 2009 at 6:15 pm

  11. Do not harm The Scatterplot. The Scatterplot is beautiful and worthy of all it demands. The Scatterplot takes care of me and enlightens me to the insufficiencies of other blogs. Scatterplot. Scatterplot. Scatterplot. Say it until it has no meaning and you will find that it means everything. Scatterplot. Scatterplot. Scatterplot.


    M. Scatterplot Sauder

    April 1, 2009 at 6:33 pm

  12. @Kieran – Hobbit Rap style?

    Hmm.. Scatter vs. OrgTheory. I have such divided loyalties. If Scatterplot and OrgTheory had some sort of ASA war (which, btw, should totally happen), I think I might have to sit back on the sidelines and laugh.


    Dan Hirschman

    April 2, 2009 at 2:16 am

  13. […] Scatterplot also teases. […]


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