futbol >> football

It’s not just the names, it’s a philosophical issue. If two creatures fight for the same turf, there has to be a winner. Nature demands it. There can only be one and I side with “futbol!” Here’s my reasoning:

  • Accurate advertising: In soccer, the main way you play is by bringing your foot to the ball. In North American “football,” kicking the ball is rare.
  • Simplicity: Soccer’s a game where the rules are simple and short. Anyone can understand them.* In the NFL, you have bizarro rules like “the Tuck Rule” and the cryptic onside kick rules. And don’t even get me started on over time scoring rules.
  • Fake injuries: In soccer, it’s a big scam!!! Nobody is injured and the flops are part of the show. It’s a sport with some high school drama tossed in. People rarely get hurt. In football, people get injured for life. Very bad.
  • Excessive celebration: In the NFL, there’s a weird rule. You get a penalty for being too happy about scoring. In contrast, soccer players are encouraged to go nuts on the field. It’s part of the fun.

I will give the NFL one point. The scoring is optimal. The combination of 1, 2, 3, and 6 points plays seems to work fairly well. It avoids the NBA problem where the first 200 points of a game mean nothing and the soccer problem of low scoring games. But soccer even has an answer for this – indoor soccer. Faster, higher scoring and fun.

Match: Futbol.

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* Ok, ok, nobody gets “offsides.” I’ll give you that one.


Written by fabiorojas

February 22, 2017 at 12:26 am

5 Responses

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  1. Futbol has a remorseless quality, esp World Cup. The best team almost always wins. By contrast, NFL and NBA have flaky outcomes all the time. Guess what’s more exciting to watch?


    Donald Frazier

    February 22, 2017 at 2:44 am

  2. There are many types of football, Association Football, American Football, Rugby League Football, Rugby Union Football, Australian Rules Football, probably others. No one code should really get to appropriate the term football. If soccer wants a name other “soccer” to be its very own, then they should choose the aspect of their game that is unique and call itself Headball. :-)


    Martin Dick

    February 22, 2017 at 7:45 am

  3. Actually, many soccer players get injured for long periods of time and even for life. Just search for “soccer player breaks leg” on Youtube (if you have a strong stomach). Also, that headers cause brain damage is well documented.



    February 22, 2017 at 10:42 am

  4. Highly amusing post, Fabio! It brought to mind an essay by Adam Gopnik wherein he noted futbol is a metaphor for man’s eternal struggle. And, sometimes when you aren’t looking, someone kicks you in the back of the shin…



    February 22, 2017 at 6:32 pm

  5. You missed the best part of soccer – normal people actually get to play.



    February 22, 2017 at 11:58 pm

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